Welcome to part 2 of our alternative gift guide, where we delve into the deepest desires of our favourite folk. (You can catch up on part 1 here, ft Alain de Botton, Marawa the Amazing, the Broken Hearts DJs, Naomi Shimada and more).

We asked our friends 3 questions;

1) what they'd realistically like for Christmas e.g a giant toblerone, new trainers

2) what they'd like in a dream world e.g a cashemere onesie, a pet badger, a yacht

3) what they'll be buying their friends

And finally we added what we'd buy for that person.

We won't actually be buying them this stuff, but it's the thought that counts, right?

THE STARSHIP TROOPER: KATE NASH (above)

Realistic Gift: Anything space-related. I’m loving all things space at the moment! I would love a telescope, or pyjamas featuring the solar system or an orrery.

Dream Gift:  I’ll continue to fight for equality for girls by working with Plan USA as an ambassador for the Because I am a Girl global initiative that creates sustainable projects in developing countries to give girls access to clean water, food, healthcare, education, and protection from violence and exploitation.
 It would also be cool to be an astronaut!

What she'll be giving: I’ll be spending Christmas with my family at my parent’s house- my mum makes the best Christmas dinner! I’ll be giving everyone my Christmas EP- it’s my first ever Christmas collection and includes original songs like, ‘I Hate You This Christmas’ – a story about having a shit Christmas because your boyfriend has cheated on you with your best friend. And there are renditions of the classics including Silent Night and Auld Lang Syne.

Run-Riot's gift: We'd get Kate LUSH's fantastic Space Girl bathbomb for her stocking, as well as Kim Boekbinder's album The Sky is Calling, inspired by all things Space! We'd also get her this planetary system necklace by Tatty Devine- perfect for any wannabe astronaut.

THE SIBLINGS: BOURGEOIS AND MAURICE

Realistic Gift: An industrial strength facial. Even the "light day look" make-up we wear can take it’s toll.

Dream Gift: For all world leaders to either be a woman or a gay.

What they're giving: We try very hard not to have “friends” since this requires a level of obligation we’re not really akin to. We also got rid of our family. As such the notion of presents is somewhat obsolete. Instead we’ll be giving each other a copy of our own album and tickets to our own show. That way we can guarantee Maurice will turn up. You can do the same.

Run-Riot's gift: We're sure B&M appreciate art, so we'd buy them this 'Hell is other people' print by Patrick Savile from The Print Club London. 

THE SPLIT PERSONALITY: BRYONY KIMMINGS aka CATHERINE BENNET

Realistic Gift: A fuck off massive engagement ring and a new coat that is so large in its scale that it makes me look like a giant lolly pop... Gareth Pugh would be nice.

Dream Gift: I would like the world to stop gendering children in such a limiting and stereotypical way and for everyone to be a little less obsessed with how they look and a little bit more obsessed with charity and being kind.

What she's giving: For pressies this year everyone is getting books. My play. It's the first book I've had printed and my whole family are so proud that they simple want one on their shelf so they can show the neighbours... That and tickets to see my old china scottee, me and some other wonderful cabaret mates knocking out turns at CAMP Estate.

Run-Riot's gift: We'd buy something to help Bryony's alter ego, the credible likeable superstar role model Catherine Bennett develop her professional skills- perhaps this dinosaur-drawing course at The Natural History Museum, taught by palaeo-artist Steve White.

THE GRINCH: JOSH WELLER (Image by Ted Dwane)

Realistic Gift: For Christmas I'd like

1. For Christmas to start on December 1st, not November 1st, the date it started this year.

2. To never have to give or receive a present ever again – Shopping for people and actually having to 'selflessly think about making them happy' is a nightmare. Feeling self-conscious about whether someone is going to like the present I bought makes me really uneasy, and in turn makes my IBS flare up, so I spend Christmas shitting. Having to fake enthusiasm when receiving bad presents is too stressful and everyone can see straight through it. Basically, if you take all the presents out of Christmas you can actually relax, and in turn, you won’t be bombarded with adverts about how the only way to make people happy is to buy them stuff. And you won’t see your kids turn into omplete cunts when they don’t get the (Insert modern toy I don’t know about here) they wanted.

3. To kill whoever invented Secret Santa. If I’m going to be forced to buy someone a present, I want them to fucking know I spent money, time and thought on them. In fact, if the present costs more than 20 quid I’ll intentionally leave the price tag on so they know I spent a decent amount of money on them. Yeah, take that Jesus.

Dream Gift: All of the above, but on the Greater Anglia train to spend Christmas with my mum in Norwich I get to sit next to Woody Allen and he really likes me. I am not sure why he’s going to Norwich.

What he's giving: Nothing. I have no money because I’m failing at life.

Run-Riot's gift: Oh Josh. We have a similar recurring dream about meeting Tina Fey and making her laugh. We'd buy Josh the ten year hoodie. Then leave him alone for the next decade.

THE ECO-LOVER: MODEL AND EDIBLE BUS-STOP FOUNDER MAK GILCHRIST ( Mak didn't have a photo of her with Santa, so here's a photo of her and the lovely David Bellamy, who looks rather like Santa on his day off...

Realistic Gift: It's a shame we are cajoled into buying gifts simply because society dictates it at a certain time of year. Still, I guess it keeps some of the economy afloat. But there's so much waste surrounding it and I find that hard to deal with. Without wishing to sound over earnest, I'd like people to make donations to charity-I've got enough 'stuff'. My preferred charity is the Second Response initiative at the Fortunate Blessings Foundation. They train caregivers on the ground after the initial emergency response to a disaster to work with and play with children after a disaster, before post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) sets in. It's an incredibly important part of disaster relief that many forget needs attending to. After the big aid charities have waded in, who's there helping to deal with the emotional disaster waiting to screw up the next generation?

If I have to name stuff then.... I'd quite like one of those things that turns paper in to logs to burn.  or something just for me, a new handbag would be very useful. A lovely ethically sourced handbag, but only if I get to choose it. And these are fabulous sweatshirts with a great cause behind them.

Dream Gift: Hmmmm, well how about Peace on Earth...? No really, that would do for starters, with access to clean water for all and an end to child hunger thrown in for good measure. On a personal level, I'd welcome a holiday. I haven't had a holiday in a very long time. Yup, that would do very nicely!

What she's giving: I shall be giving one of my bestys, a single mother of 2 wonderful energetic children, the promise of babysitting nights over winter for her to get out there and have some fun. The other besty is getting stuff to make him safer, yet still stylish of course, on his bike. I'm kind of practical with the gifts I give. 

Run-Riot's gift: We adore the work Mak's done with the Edible Bus Stop- but you can't always be outdoors- so for when she's inside we'd sign her up to Hermetica, a new terrarium company offering subscriptions for your office or home. We love terrariums (terraria..?)

We'd also get her tickets to The Feminist Magazine's anti-consumerist Christmas service where she can celebrate with other people who have enough stuff- that's all of us really, right?

See if you can spot Mak in her youth supermodelling away with Robert Palmer above- clue; look for the blue eyes. And the tongue.

THE PARTY ANIMAL: SANTIAGO GENOCHIO (Above: Santi searches for the spirit of Xmas)

Realistic Gift: I'm going to be running in the Palestine Marathon on behalf of Meru in April, so I'm hoping Santa leaves me a nice pair of running shoes under the tree.

Dream Gift: For the past ten years I've had a single dream which has kept me going: I want to own a submarine shaped like a seagull.

What he's giving: I've been busy making Christmas presents for months! I've got a pile of handmade soap and bottles of different types of flavoured vodkas! And recently I've even turned my hand to fletching - that's arrow making, not the similarly-spelled sexual act. At Rumpus HQ we've been busy preparing for our End of Year celebration, a beautifully intimate affair in a gorgeous private mansion with all the musical headliners you'd expect from us. Think waltzing in the Ballroom, think oysters in the Banquet Room, think raving in the Master Bedroom.

Run-Riot's gift: Whilst you might consider buying your average good-time guy the new Kate Moss edition of playboy, we know Santi's tastes are a little more refined. So we'd get him this Mermaids magazine. And in keeping with his love of the sea, we'd buy him The Good Hour from LUSH- complete with sea shanties, dry-ice mist and sailor's rum.

(Santi locates the spirit of Xmas!)

THE EARLY BIRD: MORNING GLORY FOUNDER SAMANTHA MOYO

Realistic Gift: My best friend is going away for a few months so I want a pet to replace her and call by her name. Seriously- something small and manageable, nothing I have to walk. This isn't creepy at all...

And I'm gifting myself a callsheet for a Morning TV Show experiment I've been wanting to do for months. Deadline for first show: end of January. Gotta treat myself.

Dream Gift: A never-ending pocket with an endless supply of everything. "I could really do with x...I'll just grab it from my never-ending pocket with an endless supply of everything!"

What she's giving: I've never been great at presents so maybe this year I'll make an effort by painting some rocks and writing "love sam" on them...or cards...basically something home-made.

Run-Riot's gift: We're big fans of Sam's Morning Glory pre-work raves, featuring massages and yoga sessions. We swear by Holistic Silk yoga mats- so cosy you can easily curl up on them for a quick power namp if need be. We'd also get her some House of Hackney pyjamas- stylish enough to wear on her Morning TV show! As far as pets are concerned- Vauxhall City Farm definitely has some baby guinea-pigs looking for new homes..

THE RIOT GRRRL: 'THE GIRLS ARE' FOUNDER ANNETTE BARLOW

Realistic Gift: This year, I think I'd like a bass guitar. Or maybe lessons. Or both. I taught myself to play the guitar when I was about 15, and I think it's only fair to admit, I'm not very good. I tend to write songs that are better suited to a bass - trouble is, I don't know how to play one. I could just pick one up and try to teach myself, but given my stupidly busy schedule, I'm sure it'd fall by the wayside. I need someone giving me a kick up the arse.

Dream Gift: The gift of time. Freelancing, editing a magazine, setting up a new design business and running a club night devour my hours, and it's not rare for me to find I've misplaced entire weeks. I'd love a 48 hour day - I'd hang out with my kitten, I'd Skype my sister in NYC every single day; I'd take my mum out for lunch; I'd go on adventures with my beloved, not caring one jot about looming deadlines and bewildering workloads.

What she's giving: This year I'll be giving everyone I know the first ever print issue of The Girls Are magazine, the physical off-shoot of music website thegirlsare.com. I started the site in 2009 after I quit my soul-evaporating job in advertising. 4 years later, we've made this beautiful print magazine and I couldn't be more proud of it. As far as I'm aware, we're the only print quarterly dedicated to women in music, which conversely makes me feel a little sad. We've got LA psych four-piece Warpaint on the cover, interviews with Micachu and the legendary Kim Gordon, not to mention incredible bespoke illustrations, swoonsome photography and paper dolls. PAPER DOLLS!

Run-Riot's gift: These genius Feminist playing cards are perfect for Annette. And we'd get her a subscription to STACK magazine to help her support print- she might also fancy popping along to their Guardian independent magazine masterclass to show off the first hard copy edition ofThe Girls Are!

THE MOTIVATOR: PERSONAL TRAINER CHARLI COHEN

Realistic Gift: It's terribly dull, but some more funds to put into the business pot! (Charli's just successfully kickstarted her own luxury fitness range)

Dream Gift: A teleportation device!

What she's giving: I'll be giving people the 2014 Fitspiration Calendar I created for my CC Effect Kickstarter campaign. Plus a few "I'm on my way" cards for new season Charli Cohen sportswear. There's something rather lovely about giving people the gift of health and fitness!

Run-Riot's gift: We'd buy Charli a trip to this Scottish eco-yoga retreat- check out the incredible outdoor baths- perfect for really relaxing and unwinding. Unfortunately we can't teleport her there. Yet.

THE IMPOSSIBLE GIRL : KIM BOEKBINDER (aka The Impossible Girl)

Realistic Gift: Christmas in Australia is what I want for Christmas. My family there is wonderful and I like the topsy turviness of Christmas in the summer. I don't care much for the religious aspects of the holiday but I love the family gathering and the present exchange.

Dream Gift: An end to food and education scarcity for every single person on planet Earth. With full stomachs and engaged minds I believe great things will happen. Even simple satisfaction is life changing for most.

What she's giving:  I rarely know until a few days before for the family. For the world, I have a video up my sleeve!

Run-Riot's gift: Last time Kim was in the UK she wore one of Alice Palmer's designs on stage- we'd buy her something from the brilliant British designer's latest collection.