Swedish dating rules you should follow to succeed

You have to visit Sweden at least once and communicate with locals to understand these people better: while modern Sweden is a pretty Westernized country, it still has lots of unique features that influence local views, values and expectations from dating and relationships a lot. Swedish dating culture is also pretty unique: modern dating rules of most Swedes are based on pretty basic human values that are common to people all over the world, but the influence of local culture and mentality is pretty strong there. If you aren’t from Sweden, but want to try Swedish dating a lot, then you’ll have to learn more about these people and their views on good relationships and how they should be - or else, you and your partner will never be able to really understand each other.

Swedes don’t come from another planet: though local people are unusually attractive and intelligent, they still value the same things in relationships, as many other nations. A Swede wants their partner to be honest, loyal, understanding, and affectionate: we all seek something real and warm when we start dating, because it makes us feel comfortable and generally happy. On the other hand, Swedes might need something more from a good relationship - or sometimes they don’t need things that you might be used to. Let’s find out more about Swedish dating culture and try to understand why it is the way it is.

Independence

Most articles have already said everything possible about Swedish independence: most Swedes wouldn’t like the idea of spending every single minute of their free time with their partners, because they are raised to enjoy and appreciate being on their own and doing their own things. A Swedish person usually has lots of hobbies and interests: many of them read books, take classes to learn something new, and they also work or study, so most people have pretty busy schedules. After a long, hard day at work, some people want to hang out with their partners, while others want just to stay at home to read, watch TV, or create something - it’s pretty normal for a Swede to choose the second scenario. You shouldn’t be offended by this: Swedish dating culture is mostly about being non-intrusive, so they don’t impose their company on anyone, and they don’t expect anyone to arrange dates every day as well. That might be one of the reasons why some people consider Sweden to be the loneliest country for expats: Swedes don’t typically initiate contacts, and they spend so much time on their own or within their circles of friends, that it’s sometimes pretty hard to communicate with them enough to become friends or partners.

Feminism and tolerance

Another side of local love for independence is Swedish tolerance. Swedish women tend to be interested in feminism a lot: they don’t want to be seen as just housewives or generic girlfriends, because they understand their value as personalities with their own interests, goals, and ambitions. They don’t tolerate sexist jokes or pushy approaches: a local woman doesn’t want to be “conquered” - she wants to be respected as a person in the first place. The whole thing about going Dutch on dates is true for Sweden: in most cases, partners pay separately at restaurants - because they can afford it, and don’t want to feel like they owe anything to a person who paid for them. That’s why one of the most crucial Swedish dating rules teaches us to be respectful and see people with personalities and interests in everyone.

What about alcohol?

People claiming that one of Swedish dating customs is to get drunk together are often right: lots of locals (especially young ones) love partying, and they often meet their potential partners on parties of their friends who invite someone new to join them. Swedes are frequently shy: these people don’t want to bother anyone, and they don’t want to seem rude or inappropriate, so in most cases, they prefer to do nothing at all - even when they like someone a lot. Alcohol helps people to forget about their limits for a while: they become more talkative and friendly, they are open to new people, and it’s ready for them to communicate and make friends. Though Swedish alcohol has a very high quality, don’t try to overdrink a Swede: lots of young locals have high tolerance to alcohol while you probably don’t, so your hangover will probably be legendary.

Marriage and kids

In many countries, marriage is a logical ending of every good romantic relationship - but not in Sweden. Though lots of younger Swedes tend to have “Western-like” marriages with guests, presents, and beautiful decorations, it’s not customary for lots of locals - Swedish dating seems to be fine without creating a family officially. Lots of Swedes create couples and live together for decades without marrying - they simply don’t see any point in it: even without getting married, partners in Sweden have lots of rights that are protected by local laws. Couples can have kids and raise them without marriages too: it’s normal there, so if you date a Swede, then you should be ready for them not being interested in becoming your husband or wife officially - and it’s not because they don’t love you.

Online dating

Like in many Western countries, people in Sweden often meet their partners online: Internet is everywhere, so it’s convenient and time-saving to use it in many spheres of life. Swedes look for local partners on the Internet, and they also enjoy international dating a lot: while some people love travelling and see no problem in dating someone living abroad, others are interested in finding soulmates and helping them to move to Sweden eventually and live together as a couple. Therefore, an account on an international dating site can help you start dating a Swedish person a lot: it’s not easy for everyone to visit Sweden in the first place or approach locals in real life, but a good dating service can make everything easy and available for everyone.